Welll
25 ways to know you have grown up
1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
Well that's true...
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
Nope, although we may need the room of a king size...
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
Not even close!!!
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
Still do that...
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
Not very often...
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
Don't have cable, have Internet porn, er I mean new's. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
Huh?
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
Not quite 130 but keep a lot on the books.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
Blue jeans and a t-shirt are 'dressed up' for me.
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
They are ones calling the cops cause I crank up my great system and it blows theirs away....
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
Many of my family members are in the medical field, my nephews tell sex jokes...
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
It does???
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
Insurance down but no car payments.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
What!?! Dog food in bowl, eat or go hungry.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
That's where I sleep now...
16. You take naps.
Nope
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
Not hardly...
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
Still like the greasy spoons...
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
Nope, nope, nope & nope, got a couple of small scars that make sure the latter two don't happen...
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
Don't like wine anyway.
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
No.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
I think I said that in younger days...
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
Porn, oh wait I mean news...
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
Yep if somebody else is driving, no more DUI's.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh crap - what the h--- happened?"
Most of already know the answer to that question...
Bonus:
26. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends 'cause you know they'll enjoy it. And now you know why I am forwarding this to you...
Doh, guess I still haven't grown up yet...
1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
Well that's true...
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
Nope, although we may need the room of a king size...
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
Not even close!!!
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
Still do that...
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
Not very often...
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
Don't have cable, have Internet porn, er I mean new's. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
Huh?
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
Not quite 130 but keep a lot on the books.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
Blue jeans and a t-shirt are 'dressed up' for me.
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
They are ones calling the cops cause I crank up my great system and it blows theirs away....
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
Many of my family members are in the medical field, my nephews tell sex jokes...
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
It does???
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
Insurance down but no car payments.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
What!?! Dog food in bowl, eat or go hungry.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
That's where I sleep now...
16. You take naps.
Nope
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
Not hardly...
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
Still like the greasy spoons...
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
Nope, nope, nope & nope, got a couple of small scars that make sure the latter two don't happen...
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
Don't like wine anyway.
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
No.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
I think I said that in younger days...
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
Porn, oh wait I mean news...
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
Yep if somebody else is driving, no more DUI's.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh crap - what the h--- happened?"
Most of already know the answer to that question...
Bonus:
26. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends 'cause you know they'll enjoy it. And now you know why I am forwarding this to you...
Doh, guess I still haven't grown up yet...
posted by Hujonwi at 03:02
2 Comments:
Most of those didn't apply to me either. Yeah...
Good on ya, forever young.
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