Question...

A reporter from Fox News ask Frwench President Chirac about Fwench military victories during WWII, WWI or any military victories?

or

A reporter from Fox News holds up a bar of soap.

Pic stolen from here.

My Office Door...

A Simple Misunderstanding

It was just a simple misunderstanding, your Honor."
Testified the man charged with indecent exposure.
"Explain that statement!" Demanded the Judge.
"Well, you see, this girl and I were drinking in a bar & she asked me what I wanted most in a woman, so I showed her."

Men strike back!

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to!
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Pirate Armada

Just checked out a site of a fellow member of the Pirate Armada The Blue Star Chronicles. Now I am ordering my legion of readers (currently 0) to stop by and check it out. I haven’t had a chance to check it out yet but am now glad I did. Damn job keeps me busy, maybe I should move to fwance?

Well the stop reminded me of something. At our last American Legion meeting the Commander showed us a picture of one of our members, Navy intel type in Iraq, with none other than Donald Rumsfeld the Secretary of Defense. That ought to give the libtards gas. He also showed us a photo of himself and another member giving his wife a blue star banner. To bad they weren’t doing that when I was in the USN cause my parents would have had two. My brother was a Combat Corpsman at the same time. Have a lot of military types in my family going back to the British in the 1800’s. That’s all I list in this post, we have found quite a few in the genealogy research.

As for the care packages, they’re great. My mom use to send them and when it arrived I would get a phone call, ‘Wilson, get your ass up here you have a care package’. The only time there were more people in the shop was payday. This was the early 80’s. One thing to remember about them is to also be creative. Once I got a Braille Playboy that was a hoot. As for packing material, use popcorn. If you can use a box big enough for this. Put a plastic bag in the box and line the bottom with 2 or 3” of popcorn. Put the rest of the stuff in there and fill with popcorn. Tie the bag off to make it as airtight as possible. It will stay eatable, hay my mom sent them from central Oklahoma to the middle of the Indian Ocean and it didn’t take log for the popcorn to disappear after I opened it.

Also ladies, send your hubby/boyfriend etc a letter and perfume it. I guarantee he will carry it in his pocket and sniff it on a regular basis, it will mean a lot. Ya he will catch some grief from his buddies, but they are just jealous.

This is a hoot...

THE ELEPHANT IN THE BEDROOM
Ten (and a half) reasons why Republicans—yes, Republicans—are the best party in bed By Anonymous

Must Read Here.

Found it here.

Yep....

THE LAST THING YOU SEE BEFORE THOSE 72 VIRGINS SHOW UP

Update:

Was thinking about this and I rememberd that a while back I read a post on The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler about the virgin thing. Well it seems, I am paraphrasing this, that there has been some new research into this ’72 virgins’ thing. Now many scholars believe that it’s not quite accurate. The new translation should read; you will open your eyes in a very, very hot place. Surrounded by 72 very well hung and amorous demons and YOU are the virgin…

First Found Here.

Found Here.

Grrrrrrrrrr

This shit really pisses me off. Yea that's a mexican flag on top. I say let's send all the ILLEGAL types home. What part of ILLEGAL don't the libtards get??? If their home country says they will not take them back, well I have an answer for that too. It's a thing called a parachute...

Found Here.

Biker Lawnmower

A man with only a few seconds to live...

Reach out and Thump Someone

It has been said that when you absolutely, positively need something destroyed overnight you bring in the Marines. Well, thanks to the Milkor M32, that job may have just gotten a whole lot easier.

That aren’t no shit. Along with the U.S. Navy, somebody has to give them a ride...

The M32 is a 6-shot, shoulder fired 40mm grenade gun that is being tested by the Marine Corps as a potential replacement to the single-shot, under-barrel M203 grenade launcher, which has been in the Corps’ arsenal since the 1960s

Now it's going to be even more of a 'bad day' for those 'little sheet heads' and anybody else that wants to mess with us. I mean shit, go read about that thing.

The Marines have designated the new weapon the M-32 Multiple shot Grenade Launcher (M-32 MGL, or M-32 MSGL). According to Jane's Defence Weely (January 11, 2006), the U.S. Marine Corps has purchased approx 9,000 units of the new (updated/upgraded) weapon system. Milkor USA could not confirm this number. However, they did confirm that an unspecified number of M32 MGL 40mm multiple grenade launchers was purchased by the USMC.

This is good news. Let's see what have the peaceful mooooslems given the world in the last 200 years? I'm thinking. Well can't come up with anything other than homicide bombers. Oh wait there was that book 'How to please your goat'. What do we do? Well besides the betterment of the world we devise more ingenious ways to kill you.

Stand By For High Seas And Heavy Rolls…

p.s. And no virgins….

Full Story Here.

Prayers...

FEMALE PRAYER

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep.
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks
One who'll call, not wait for weeks
I pray he's gainfully employed
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end
And always be my very best friend.
Amen.

MALE PRAYER

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with big boobs who owns a liquor store and grows her own pot. This doesn't rhyme and I don't care.
Amen.

Excerpt:

Your alarm goes off, you hit the snooze and sleep for another 10 minutes.

He stays up for days on end.
__________________________

You take a warm shower to help you wake up.

He goes days or weeks without running water.
__________________________

You complain of a “headache”, and call in sick.

He gets shot at, as others are hit, and keeps moving forward.
__________________________

You put on your anti-war/don’t support the troops shirt, and go meet up with your friends.

He still fights for your right to wear that shirt.
__________________________

You make sure your cell phone is in your pocket.

He clutches the cross hanging on his chain next to his dogtags.
__________________________

You talk trash on your “buddies” that aren’t with you.

He knows he may not see some of his buddies again.

Full Story Here.

Found Here.

So True....

Why does the bar association prohibit lawyers and clients from having sex?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

Prosecutors Drop Student-Sex Charges

(CBS/AP) State prosecutors decided Tuesday to drop charges against a former teacher accused of having sex with a 14-year-old student.

My only question is. Where were these teachers when I was in school. Shit.

Redneck Computer Lingo

Redneck Computer Lingo

"Hard drive" -- Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.
"Keyboard" ---- Place to hang your truck keys.
"Window" ------ Place in the truck to hang your guns.
"Floppy" ------ When you run out of Polygrip.
"Modem" ------- How you got rid of your dandelions.
"ROM" --------- Delicious when you mix it with coca cola.
"Byte" -------- First word in a kiss-off phrase.
"Reboot" ------ What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.
"Network" ----- Activity meant to provide bait for your trot line.
"Mouse" ------- Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in order to get a free case.
"LAN" -------- To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."
"Cursor" ------ What some guys do when they are mad at their wife and/or girlfriend.
"bit" --------- A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the porch longways."
"digital control" -- What yore fingers do on the TV remote.
"packet" ------ What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.

Deep Thoughts...

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
- William Morrow

Yep...

Have you heard about the prostitute with a degree in psychology?
She blows your mind.

no shit

We can often do more for other men by trying to correct our own faults than by trying to correct theirs.
- Francois Fenelon

Oh yea...

Somali Militiamen Say U.S. Shot First

Let’s start with ‘Somali Militiaman’ WTF they don’t even have a government in that shit hole of a country. How about ‘Our thugs shot at you and we got our Asses handed to us’.
If you think that was an ‘ass whoppin’ be glad the USMC wasn’t involved.

Be very thankful.
This is a update to an earlier post.

(CBS/AP) Somali militiamen who skirmished with U.S. Navy vessels claimed Sunday they did not fire the first shot and that they had been patrolling Somali waters to stop illegal fishing vessels.

Skirmished, are you frellin kidding me??? See first paragraph. Oh by the way we believe you were looking for ‘illegal fishing vessels’ NOT.

He said that in total 27 Somali militiamen had been patrolling off the Somali coast before the gunbattle. Fourteen returned to shore safely, Barqad said on two-way radio from the central Somali town of Harardhere.

Yea right. I’m a former swab jockey I know a little about this shit.
And dickhead reporter started out this paragraph with this statement as if it was ‘truth’.

The U.S. Navy opened fire first on the Somali militiamen's small utility boat, which was towing a pair of skiffs, said Barqad. His statement contradicted U.S. claims that the navy vessels were fired upon.

The militiamen, "were in an operation to protect the country's sea resources from illicit exploitation by foreign vessels," Barqad said.

The Spanish term for that is ‘El Toro PoPo.

Geraad Mohamud, also from the same militia group, threatened that they would kill any hostagethey capture and that they would attack any ship unlawfully plying Somali waters unless their men were released.

Oh wait, must stop laughing, tears in eyes, ribs hurt, rolling on floor. Oh shit.. Now that I have assured the neighbors that nothing is wrong other than dealing with libtards.

You wearers of dirty night shirts don’t really get it do ya? In Mogadishu we had 17 brave soldiers die. Your side had 1800. If that is the odds ya want.

BRING IT ON….

Yep....

Man has been endowed with reason, with the power to create, so that he can add to what he's been given.
- Anton Chekhov (1860-1904) Russian dramatist and writer

Not PC here...

So True....

Welcome To The 21st Century, Same As The 7th

Oh does my blog father have a great rant about the worshippers of the pedophile prophet, ya know, the camel-humping clapweasels.

All I can say is Go Read…

AN OLD FARMER...

AN OLD FARMER WENT TO TOWN TO SEE A MOVIE.

THE TICKET AGENT ASKED, "SIR, WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR SHOULDER?"

THE OLD FARMER SAID, "Oh, THAT'S MY PET ROOSTER, CHUCKY. WHEREVER I GO, CHUCKY GOES."

"I AM SORRY SIR," SAID THE TICKET AGENT. "WE CAN'T ALLOW ANIMALS IN THE THEATER."

THE OLD FARMER WENT AROUND THE CORNER AND STUFFED THE BIRD DOWN HIS OVERALLS. HE RETURNED TO THE BOOTH, BOUGHT A TICKET AND ENTERED THE THEATER. HE SAT DOWN NEXT TO TWO OLD WIDOWS NAMED MILDRED AND MARGE.

THE MOVIE STARTED AND THE ROOSTER BEGAN TO SQUIRM. THE OLD FARMER UNBUTTONED HIS FLY SO CHUCKY COULD STICK HIS HEAD OUT AND WATCH THE MOVIE.

"MARGE," WHISPERED MILDRED.

"WHAT?" SAID MARGE.

"I THINK THE GUY NEXT TO ME IS A PERVERT."

"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK SO?" ASKED MARGE.

"HE UNDID HIS PANTS AND HE HAS HIS THING OUT," WHISPERED MILDRED.

"WELL, DON'T WORRY A BOUT IT," SAID MARGE. "HELL, AT OUR AGE WE'VE SEEN 'EM ALL"

"I THOUGHT SO TOO," SAID MILDRED, "BUT THIS ONE'S EATIN' MY POPCORN!"

Mooslem Repellent

Montana...

Three strangers strike up a conversation in the airport passenger lounge in Bozeman, Montana, awaiting their flights.
One is an American Indian passing through from Lame Deer. Another is a Cowboy on his way to Billings for a livestock show and the third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arrived at Montana State University from the Middle East .
Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures. Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.
The cowboy leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table and tips his big sweat-stained hat forward over his face. The wind outside is blowing tumbleweeds around, and the old windsock is flapping; but still no plane comes.
Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks, "At one time here, my people were many, but sadly, now we are few."
The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward, "Once my people were few," he sneers, "and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?"
The Montana cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side of his mouth and from the darkness beneath his Stetson says in a drawl,
"That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet, but I do believe it's a-comin'."

Oh brother

Oh brother

I was looking through the news and saw this headline and thought 'I wonder'. Well I clicked and found out.

Food Industry a Target in Obesity Fight

Oh great I thought, more junk about how it's all their fault. Pretty close.

It's tempting to blame big food companies for America's big obesity problem. After all, they're the folks who Supersized our fries, family-portioned our potato chips and Big Gulped our sodas. There's also the billions they've spent keeping their products ever on our minds and in our mouths.

Well a shot at trying to be balanced...It starts it's usual libtard spin down from there.

Yale obesity expert Dr. David Katz says that's because companies aggressively peddle food to people who don't need it.
Food industry officials prefer to call it consumer choice.

Just what it is, consumer choice but nooooo it's 'their' fault those big bad evil companies.

"We don't think the food industry has done anything particularly wrong in this regard," says Robert Earl of the Food Products Association, a lobbying group that prefers to indict sedentary lifestyles and poor choices.

At least they gave the 'other side' a chance to speak. Although very little.

He's right. Consumers bear much responsibility for their weight and the fact that two-thirds of Americans are overweight or obese. It's not the industry's fault that people don't get exercise, or that schools have cut physical education, or that people prefer the taste of Twinkies (500 million sold a year) to tofu (much less).

Damn more 'clue batting' I'm shocked, shocked I tell you that the reporter is actually allowing facts to be printed. The only people who like the taste of tofu are fwench.

Libtard Alert Libtard Alert

But critics call Earl's assessment disingenuous. Personal responsibility has limits in the face of a multibillion-dollar marketing whirlwind pushing countless high-calorie treats.

I Call Bull Shit. Damn liberals and their 'it ain't my fault' attitude. No You are responsibility for your actions. Period. I knew they would slip that shit in there.

Personal responsibility also falters when it comes to children, who are bombarded by junk food ads that undermine parents.

Everything from child-friendly merchandizing of sugary cereals to cartoon ads is designed to give companies more sway over what children eat, says Dr. Susan Lynch, a child obesity doctor and wife of New Hampshire Gov. John Lynch.

They even blame big bad evil companies for parents doing a lousy job. Friggin wankers.
I remember sitting down for supper and my son saying 'I don't want that I want this'. My replys 'It's that or nothing'. After going to bed without eating a couple of times he was more than happy to eat whatever was cooked.
Also remember stopping at sonic a few times and asking what kind of kid's meal he wanted and if he wanted orange juice or milk. Of course he wanted a soda. I said 'milk or orange juice or nothing'. He didn't throw a fit cause he knew that it would be nothing and a spanking when we got home.
That came from the two times he decided to throw a fit in a store over something he wanted. I'm not talking about whining I'm talking about a fit. I would put him under my arm and carry him out of the store with him screaming and kicking. After I put him in the car I told him 'now not only are you not going to get what you wanted but your getting a spanking when we got home'. He did. Don't get me wrong there were a lot of times we did get him something he wanted, but he knew what throwing a fit would get him.
That reminds me of another story. We lived in a small farming town. I was in the grocery store and heard a mom tell her son 'straighten up or I'll spank you right here'. Her son looks at her and says 'you don't have a belt'. I walked up and said 'Excuse me, do you need to borrow my belt' as I reached to unbuckle it. That boy's eyes got pretty big. She looked at him and said 'Well am I going to need it' he looked at her and said 'no'. From what I could tell he didn't give her any more trouble. I'll never forget the look on his face. Priceless.

Full Story Here. Have puke bag handy.

Stupid move

I saw this headline and knew things were not going to end well, at least for the pirates.

Navy Exchanges Fire With Suspected Pirates

DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP) - Two U.S. Navy warships exchanged gunfire with suspected pirates Saturday off the coast of Somalia, and one suspect was killed and five others were wounded, the navy said.

They’re lucky that they’re not all dead. I didn’t know what kind of ships the US had there but I know their 5” guns are very accurate. Thinking they were using frigates.

No sailors were wounded in the battle, which occurred at about 5:40 a.m. local time, approximately 25 nautical miles off the Somali coast in international waters.

That’s good news, now more on my brothers in arms.

The suspected pirates were holding what appeared to be rocket-propelled grenade launchers, the navy said. When the suspects began shooting, naval gunners returned fire with mounted machine guns, killing one man and igniting a fire on the vessel.

That would mean 50 cal. Stooooopid pirates. No doubt too small for the 5” there wouldn’t have been anything left, not like that would be a ‘bad thing’.

The Cape St. George, a guided-missile cruiser, and Gonzalez, a guided-missile destroyer, were conducting maritime security operations in the area. They are based in Norfolk, Va.

Damn those pirates got off lucky, very lucky. Thinking frigates and then reading a cruiser and tin can. Shit those guys got off lucky. If it was up to me I would tell the squids to just sink all pirate ships they see. Period. No Quarter, no warning nothing except the last thing they would see would be a white puff from a 5” cannon then boom.

Full Story Here

That's gonna leave a mark...

We keep hearing the libtards running around yelling 'no WMD's, no connection between Sadly Insane and OBL'. Well guess what ABC is reporting...

New Documents from Saddam Hussein's Archives Discuss Bin Laden, WMDs

I'm Shocked, Shocked I tell you...

March 16, 2006 - Following are the ABC News Investigative Unit's summaries of four of the nine Iraqi documents from Saddam Hussein's government, which were released by the U.S. government Wednesday.

They try to put the usual anti-bush spin on it but...

Full Story Here.

Found Here. Not work safe.

Ten Commandments

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse is that you cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians.

It creates a hostile work environment

Bubba & Junior

Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A blond lady walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder."
The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement & announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.
Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde?
We ask for the height, and she gives us the length.

Bubba and Junior are currently employed by the City of New Orleans supervising the reconstruction of the New Orleans Levees.

Kool

We had peacocks a few times when I was growing up but I've never seen anything like this.
Thanks Mom.

Yep

The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.
- Joseph Joubert

Living Wills

My wife and I were sitting in the TV room watching a report on Living Wills and I said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle.

If that ever happens to me, just pull the plug."

She got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of my beer.
She's such a wicked woman.

PMS

Why do they call it PMS?
Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken

Stick it to the ACLU

There is legislation in Congress that would put the screws to the American Commie Lovers Union and stop them from getting most of their funding from U.S. taxpayers. We got some info at our post that I presented it at our American Legion meeting last night. It's about their and I'm sure many others fight to get the PERA law passed. It would stop the libtards from collecting attorney fees. Did ya know they got over $900,000.00 for kicking the Boy Scouts out of Balboa Park in San Diego? There is more info here.
American Legion fight against ACLU

If you are a veteran consider joining the American Legion and help in the fight.

This is Kool

American Legion Riders to Honor Military

INDIANAPOLIS, March 13, 2006 - Imagine hundreds of motorcycle riders on bikes of all shapes, sizes and colors roaring across the Midwest, over the great plains, the Rockies, and the deserts of Utah enroute to Salt Lake City. Now imagine if these bikers were wartime era veterans riding 1,700 miles to make possible a college education for the children of those who have died defending our freedoms since September 11, 2001.
The riders’ goal is to raise $100,000 for the American Legacy Scholarship Fund.

Just ran across this while I was looking for something else. Go figure? If ya follow the link there is more info and a link to a site to sign up for it. Maybe I can get my sled up and running in time. There is always hope...

New Holiday

I didn't know it but we have a new holiday on the 14th of March.
It's Steak and BJ Day!!!

Go here for more info.
About time us guys got a holiday.

I kid you not...

I had read an AP story about the Israeli troops had hit a paloswinian prison and captured a goat humper that killed some Israeli. Hamas has said they were going to release him and I kinda wondered what they would do.
I was going on through my IWON homepage (what I use now cause yahoo [sucks] went jihad on me) and went into the SeeBS news section and this is that I ran across.

Palestinian Prisoners Surrender
A Palestinian militant leader and his accomplices surrendered to Israeli troops after a raid on a West Bank prison. Palestinian gunmen kidnapped at least 10 foreigners in retaliation for the raid.


That was the headline and teaser. I don't know who wrote it but ya can figure out who's side it's on. Oh ya these people need a state and will peacefully co-exist with the rest of the world. Oh yea bite the hand that feeds you. Idiots.

Frightened foreigners took refuge at Palestinian security headquarters in Gaza as militants attacked offices linked to the United States and Europe, torching the British Council building in Gaza City. Among those kidnapped were an American professor, two South Korean journalists, a Canadian aid worker and two Australian teachers at an American school.

I can't for the life of me figure out why the Israeli army would want him, alive.

The target of the Israeli raid was Ahmed Saadat, the leader of the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine, a radical PLO group, reports CBS News correspondent Robert Berger (audio). Saadat was jailed in Palestinian-ruled Jericho after the group claimed responsibility for the killing of Israeli Cabinet Minister Rehavam Zeevi in 2001.

Saadat was elected to the Palestinian legislature in January.


Yep elect a terrorist group to head your government and murders then wonder why the world doesn't want to have anything to do with you. Ate up with stupid comes to mind...

Travel by Harley

Two fleas from Detroit had an agreement to meet every winter in Miami for a vacation.

Last year when one flea gets to Miami, he's all blue, shivering and shaking, damn near frozen to death!

The other flea asks him, "What the hell happened to you?"

The first flea ! says, "I rode down here from Detroit in the mustache of a guy on a Harley."

The other flea responds saying," That's the worst way to travel!

Try what I do. Go to the Metro airport bar. Have a few drinks. While you are there, look for a nice stewardess. Crawl up her leg and nestle in where it's warm and cozy. You'll be in Miami in no time. It's the best way to travel that I can think of."

The first flea thanks the second flea and says he will give it a try next winter.

A year goes by..... When the first flea shows up in Miami he is all blue, and shivering and shaking again. Damn near frozen to death.

The second flea says, "Didn't you try what I told you?"

Yes," says the first flea, "I did exactly as you said.....

I went to the Metro airport bar. I had a few drinks. Finally, this nice young stewardess came in. I crawled right up to her warm cozy spot. It was so nice and warm that I fell asleep immediately. When I woke up, I was back in the mustache of the guy on the Harley!

Da thurth

Driving our family to a new restaurant, I took several wrong turns.
When I finally found the right road, I asked my husband, "Why didn't
you tell me I was lost?"
"I thought you knew where you were going," he replied.
"You always know where you're going when I'm driving."

I’ve been Rott Launched!!!!!!!!!!!

Not only have I been Rott Launched but he added me to his blog roll in “Dept. of Unapologetic Americanism”

WOW

I am not a wordsmith nor do I have a college edumaction. I’m just a HS grad and a USN vet that speaks my mind.

WOW

A Rott Launch!!!!!!!!!

I’m on the Rott blog roll. Talk about Inspiration.

Now I’m on the Rott blog roll, the only way things get better involve a case Danish beer and a lady… and she doesn’t drink…or a Danish lady and 2 cases of beer....
That would be even better....

I have a Split Personality

I hate cats but
I love pussy...

Southern Life...

Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state; not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."

Guaranteed Erection Killer

Erection killer hell, not only has he gone into hiding so has his two buddies.

Oooops

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his 25th wedding anniversary.
His wife told him "Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes from zero to 250 in 2 seconds flat".
The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Saturday.

Mexico Earthquake

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale has hit Mexico.

Two million Mexicans have died and over a million are injured. The country is totally ruined and the government doesn't know where to start with providing help to rebuild.

The rest of the world is in shock.

Canada is sending troopers to help the Mexican army control the riots.

Saudi Arabia is sending oil.

Other Latin American countries are sending supplies.

The European community (except France) is sending food and money.

The United States, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement Mexicans.

God Bless America

Speechless...

The sun is going away, but don't panic...

I thought this was an odd headline, pondering that it might be something about a scientist saying that the sun was going to burn out in 100,000 years. But it was in the Odd News section so I had to check it out. What I read left me, well speechless...

ABUJA (Reuters) - The Nigerian government, anxious to avoid a repeat of riots that marked a solar eclipse in 2001, warned citizens they may suffer "psychological discomfort" during a new eclipse this month but urged them not to panic.

Information Minister Frank Nweke said an eclipse five years ago caused riots in northern Borno state because people did not know why it happened.

"Some people even felt some evil people in their communities were responsible for the eclipse," he said in a statement on Thursday aimed at reassuring Nigerians that the eclipse is expected to darken parts of the country on March 29.

"The eclipse is not expected to have any real damaging effect, only social and psychological discomforts are envisaged," Nweke said.

He did not explain what the discomforts might be.

Question...

AU stops short of agreeing to UN mission in Darfur

ADDIS ABABA (Reuters) - The African Union on Friday extended its mission in Darfur until September 30 to buy time to break an impasse over the transfer of peacekeeping duties in Sudan's vast west to U.N. forces.
Instead the communiqué reiterated the AU's decision taken earlier this year to "support in principle" the eventual transition to a U.N. force in Darfur, where rape, pillaging and killing by militias has driven 2 million villagers into camps.

Can anybody tell me why African countries don't want to do anything about arab moooslems, ya know peaceful and tolerant, killing black people in Africa?

Sad Day

No Jimmah Carter didn't get maimed by a mutant rabbit.

I got to see a few of those bad boys in action while I was in the Navy. Wow what an airplane. The Bird Farm I was on had F-4's, A-6's and A-7's and I could sleep with them taking off and landing. When I was going to school in Key West (rough duty) they had a squadron there and those babies would wake me up when they took off. Watching them in action was quite a site. Sad to see them go.

'Top Gun' Jets Return From Final Combat VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. (AP) - There will be no more dogfights for the Tomcat. The last two squadrons of the sleek, Cold War fighter jet returned home from their final deployment Friday, two decades after the warplanes were glamorized in the 1986 Tom Cruise movie "Top Gun."

USN

This will be an interesting story to keep in sync.

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. I was in the US Navy stationed on the USS Coral Sea CV-43 in Alameda CA.

Bill and I stopped by a park to drink a few cold ones. We ran into some other guys from the ship. There were a lot of civvies around so we decided to head to another section of the park. I think maybe 5 cars with less than 20 guys. We were standing around our cars, drinking beer and talking when several cop cars pulled up. We thought, WTF, no loud music etc. A sergeant walked up and said, “Is this it?” With a few in me I replied ‘Is this what?’ He said, ‘We got a call that there was a big party going on over here’. We all look at each other and ask ‘what big party”. The police sergeant says ‘Somebody from the apartment complex over there said there was a big loud party going over here’. We all look at each other again and say “Just us, not trying to cause any trouble’. He ask ‘Well are all of you old enough to drink?’ We lied and said ‘Yes’.

He ask “Well do you mind if we look around?” We said ‘Sure go for it’.

Well a couple of the officers started looking in the cars and one came by my truck, looked at my rear view mirror and noticed a small stuffed raccoon hanging from it in a hangman’s noose. He turned and looked at me with one of those WTF looks. I said, “What else do ya do with it?”

I know that if the lady that gave it to me is reading this she will be irked. She sure was then. But it makes a great story to talk about now.

The cops had a little talk and the sergeant told us “you guys, finish your beers, take off, I don’t see anything here and I don’t want to have to come back”.

We Did.

One of many stories about my time in the USN.

I Wonder...

Either something crawled under my trailer and died or I need to take out the trash.
Till I figure out which, where is the incense...

Lame Stream Media....

'Protect your future' is seen written in Arabic, on the handle of gun [what?] of an Iraqi soldier as he inspects the site of a car bomb in Baghdad, Iraq, Thursday, March 9, 2006.

Yes that is the caption for that AP photo. I always knew the journalist were idiots but this takes the cake. In case ya don't know that's known as the butt stock.

Just go Read...

The Saint In The Tank

"We saw some terrible scenes. But a lot of men had it tougher than I did. The kind of war you see today is completely different. But if I was young enough to enlist, I’d do it all over again, absolutely." - Bob Persinger, about his service in Patton's 3rd Army in WWII

Sure wish I could....

Must read story here.

Interesting...

To start with I'm not advocating smoking.

That being said, was listening to the radio this morning and there was a story about the girl that just died of lung cancer and the fact that she never smoked. Well at least the lady being interviewed was honest. She said that 60% of lung cancer patients have either never smoked or quit years ago. That's right 60%. Not to sure about that figure myself cause I heard on another show that less than 15% of smokers get lung cancer.
Not quite sure what to think about all of that. I'm guessing that some anti-smoking jihadist are playing fast and loose with the facts or out right lies about smoking. It makes one wonder that if they took a bunch of the chemicals out of smokes that they put into them that the rate of smokers getting lung cancer would go down even more.
Now I just heard one that said that 20% of lung cancer is in people who have never smoked. WTF. If ya go by these numbers ya have a better chance of not getting lung cancer if ya keep smoking.

Now I'm promoting smoking, but it is a great way to take more breaks than your do-gooder co-workers...

Things Men SHOULDN'T Say Out Loud In Victoria's Secret:

Things Men SHOULDN'T Say Out Loud In Victoria's Secret:
9) No Thanks. Just Sniffing.
8) I'll be in the dressing room going blind.
7) Mom will love this.
6) Oh the size won't matter. She's inflatable.
5) No need to wrap it up. I'll eat it here.
4) Will you model this for me???
3) The Miracle What??? This is better than world peace!!
2) Forty Five bucks?? You're just gonna end up naked ANYWAY!!
And the number one thing that a man should never, ever say out loud in
Victoria's Secret:
1) Oh, honey, you'll NEVER squeeze your ass into that!!

Oh, now I know why they won't let me in there or Fredricks anymore....
Or was it because I picked up a bra and panty set and ask where the dressing room was...

Good Advice...

One day mom was cleaning juniors room and in the closet she found a
bondage S+M magazine. This was very upsetting for her.

She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He
looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word.

She finally asked him, "Well what should we do about this?"

Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."

Einstein

Less than a month from now will be the anniversary of Albert Einstein's birthday. He was born March 14, 1879. Few remember that the Nobel Prize winner married his cousin, Elsa Lowenthal, after his first marriage dissolved in 1919.

He stated that he was attracted to Elsa because she was well endowed.

He postulated that if you are attracted to women with large breasts, the attraction is stronger if there is a DNA connection.

It's called Einstein's Theory of Relative Titty

GETTING OLD . . .

A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair well groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel smelling slightly of a good after shave, presenting a well looked-after image, walks into an upscale cocktail lounge. Seated at the bar is an elderly looking lady, (mid eighties). The gentleman walks over, sits alongside of her, orders a drink, takes a sip, turns to her and says, "So tell me, do I come here often?"

Oh Yea...

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event, hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

She said, "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am," the Sergeant Major said, "Just serious by nature."

"The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

The Sergeant Major's short reply was, "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

The Sergeant Major looked at her and replied, "1955."

She said, "Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterwards, and panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now."

Mooslem Repellent

AKA Awesome Rack Day
Now if I could just find an effective barking moonbat repellent. We know the truth doesn't work, that just causes them to run around yelling 'fascist'.
Considering yahoo (sucks) claimed some of the links on my blog there (before they went jihad on it) were to 'hate speech' sites.
jeeeze.

NOT IN YOUR NAME!

A country was liberated from the claws of a sadistic dictator and his psychotic sons -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

That country recently held democratic elections and now have, for the first time, a government that they themselves have chosen -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

The psychopath responsible for at least the 300,000 victims mentioned in the above has been brought to justice and will murder no more -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

The Kurds will no longer have to fear seeing helicopter gunships spreading poison gas over their villages, as a matter of fact one of their own was just elected President -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

Iraqi schoolgirls will no longer have to fear being picked up, abducted, raped and fed to dogs by Uday and Qusay -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

Plastic shredders in Iraq will no longer be used for anything other than shredding plastic -
BUT IT WAS NOT IN YOUR NAME.

And we could go on, as we shall if any of those terror-supporting "peace" freaks ever presume to claw their way to the foothills of the moral high ground.

NOT IN YOUR NAME!

I Found It...

This was a post I put on my yahoo (sucks) blog before they went jihad on it (hate speach). Well my birthday was January 16th sooo it's a little late here. Oh well.

Happy Birthday to Me!!
Just to let all my faithful readers (currently 0) know that 46 years ago in the middle of Oklahoma I was born [insert snide comment here]. It's been quite a ride. Just finished a year from hell, should say another one, there have been a couple of others but nothing like this. My business, life savings and house on 5 acres all gone. Now don't get me wrong I'm not bitter or mad I just know that sometimes life takes a dump on you. It's not a question of 'if life is going to take a dump it's a question of when. The question is what do you do next, stay down or get back up and dust yourself off and get back in the game. I'm just glad I live in a country where not only did I have a chance but can try again. I have to admit that it is kinda nice to get back to my old self and making people laugh.
That reminds me, do you know the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? The taste.
In the last 3 years I've gone from a broadcast engineer, maintaining a 3-camera video & audio production facility to a small business owner to a farm hand. Yep quite the ride. While I was working as a farmhand for my dad over the summer I spent a lot of time in his John Deere tractors. That also means lots of time to think, then and as I have been doing lately. Ya know all the woulda coulda shoulda stuff as you look back over your life. The stuff like what would ya change but since I can't there's no use in going there. Don't get me wrong there are a lot of things I did that were wrong (still do but just not a many now). No doubt there were plenty of bad decisions, wrong moves, head up my butt and hurt people. I just can't go back and change any of it all I can do is learn from my mistakes in the past and try not to make the same ones in the future. There are a couple of things I would do differently but as they say 'hindsight is always 20/20'. Although I think all of those experiences, including the nights I've spent in jail, have helped shape and form me into the person I am today. I'm glad I'm not the young, dumb and full of cum and whisky guy that I once was. I hurt a lot of people and did some mean things in those days before I pulled my head out of my ass. There is nothing I can do to change that except be better person in the here and now.
In another way a lot of those experiences have helped me to be a stronger person. I've seen a lot of people who led sheltered lives. With one job I had, we were hired to shoot video of the aftermath of a prison riot. The inmates were locked down but the other guy I was with would nearly pee his pants every time an inmate would yell something at him. I would just yell an answer back and go on. My last girlfriend was the same way. She would sit like a deer in the headlights when I was talking about some of the mundane exploits of my life. No wouldn't want to be like them.
Damn, I'm starting to sound like my dad, shit.
Well I'm off to electrocute the cat.
Yes I live alone and have a cat, whose only purpose in life is to be tortured and catch mice.
Hopefully I'll get a story posted about my trip to the health food store. All of you who know me can pick your jaw up off the floor.

Broke Back Mountain

This tall, rugged, brawny, muscular cowboy comes down off of Broke Back Mountain to get a physical.

The doctor tells him, "Look, I'’m not going to lie to you. You have AIDS."

"What can I do, doc?'"

"Well, you can go home, eat 40 red hot sausages, 30 jalapenos, 20 unpeeled carrots soaked in pepper oil, 10 raw heads of cabbage, and drink 5 gallons of prune juice.'"

"Will that cure me, doc?"

"No. But it will give you a better idea of what your ass is for."

Australian Investment Advice

In 2001, if you had bought $1,000 of One-Tel stock, it would now be worth about $9 to you as an unsecured creditor if you are lucky.

In 2002, if you had bought HIH stock, you would have about $6.50 left of the original $1,000 investment.

In 2003, if you had gone overseas and bought ENRON, you would have less than $5 left.

But, If you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer in early 2005 - one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned the aluminum cans in for the recycling price, you would have $24!

Based on the above, the best investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

Not sure....

While in China, a man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom all the time. A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots.

Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.

The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says: "I've got bad news for you --- you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here. We know very little about it."

The man looks a little perplexed and says: "Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc."

The doctor answers: "I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis."

The man screams in horror, "Absolutely not! I want a second opinion."

The doctor replies: "Well, it's your choice. Go ahead if you want, but surgery is your only choice."

The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease. The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims: "Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. Vely rare disease."

The guy says to the doctor: "Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to operate and amputate my penis !"

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs: "Stupid Amelican docta, always want to opelate. Make more money that way. No need to opelate!"

Oh, Thank goodness!" the man replies.

"Yes," says the Chinese doctor, "You no worry! Wait two weeks. Faw off by itself! You save money."

Texas Law

WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice-President Dick Cheney the Medal of Freedom, the national highest civilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney.

The source was quoted to say "All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another and Cheney actually had the guts to do it".

In a related story, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters, wishing to bag a lawyer, to have the new "lawyer's stamp" on their hunting license. Currently Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer, and bear, at a cost of $7 annually. The new "lawyers stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long.

The department further stated that although the "lawyers stamp" comes at hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate annual revenues in excess of $3 billion dollars the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting license stamps.

Another Take

Ya keep hearing from the liberal’s and ‘peaceful mooslems’ that profiling or that looking deeper into people from terrorist supporting countries is ‘wrong’. Well let’s just consider this scenario.

A group of 15 Americans, 1 Canadian, 1 Englishman,. 1 Spaniard and 1 Frenchman (I know the Frenchman is a stretch but work with me) hijack 4 Arab airliners and fly them into Mecca and Medina another hit’s a big oil producing plant and the other is headed for Riyadh when it crashes in the litter box.

Well, we have seen how the ‘tolerant and peaceful mooslems’ react over cartoons. My guess would be that they would have killed all the Americans they could find, to start with. Then kill anybody else they could find that might be a WASP.

After which any American or WASP that wanted to enter their ‘peaceful, tolerant’ mooslem countries would be subjected to things I would have a hard time thinking of.

Just something to think about.

If it were up to me, there would be a separate line for ‘peaceful & tolerant’ mooslems at airports among other places. The screener would say ‘get ready to not only remove all of all of your clothes but we will let ya know how your colon is doing.

Oh no, we can't question their "patriotism".

If ya ever wondered about the agenda of the Lame Stream Media and other Al-Qaeda supporters, aka liberals. Just go and read the rest of this.

But then she came to the point. Not only had she '‘known'’ the Iraq war would fail but she considered it essential that it did so because this would ensure that the '‘evil'’ George W. Bush would no longer be running her country. Her editors back on the East Coast were giggling, she said, over what a disaster Iraq had turned out to be. '‘Lots of us talk about how awful it would be if this worked out.' Startled by her candour, I asked whether thousands more dead Iraqis would be a good thing.
She nodded and mumbled something about Bush needing to go.

Full Story Here.

Frellin Traitors

Star Trek...

A Saudi was talking with an American co-worker one day and said.

“My son and I both enjoy the Star Trek shows but there is one thing that we noticed”

“What was that?” ask the American.

“Well” the Saudi said, “There are no Arabs or Muslims in any of them”.

The American replied “Well that’s because it takes place in the future”.

DUDE, WHERE'S MY CIVIL WAR?

That's the headline from an OP-ED piece from the New York Post. The reporter is acutally on the ground and talking with the Iraqi people, imagine that. It gets better.

March 5, 2006 -- BAGHDAD

I'M trying. I've been trying all week. The other day, I drove another 30 miles or so on the streets and alleys of Baghdad. I'm looking for the civil war that The New York Times declared. And I just can't find it.

Maybe actually being on the ground in Iraq prevents me from seeing it. Perhaps the view's clearer from Manhattan. It could be that my background as an intelligence officer didn't give me the right skills.


Read the rest of the smack down here.

Found Here Not Work Safe if you are around Liberals.

Nuked by Yahoo (sucks)

Well I started a blog on Yahoo (sucks) after the first of the year. Was just blogging along when it suddenly disappeared. So did my email, homepage and messenger. Whisky Tango Foxtrot I thought, so I emailed them asking ‘What’s up’.

The only reply I received was from a survey site asking me about what I though about how my question was handled. WTF I had not received a response from them. So after letting them know that it was a 1 out of 10 I finally get a reply that has cryptic references to their ‘Terms of Service’.

I reply asking, ‘OK if I violated your TOS on the blog why did ya nuke my email etc. and not dump the blog?

Well I finally got another somewhat vague email that said,

Any Yahoo! 360 page may be removed for violations of the Terms of Service and Guidelines, which may include some of the following:

adult images,advertisements; soliciting sales outside of Yahoo!; spamming; copyright infringement; items associated with hate groups; drug paraphernalia

Ding Ding Ding We have a winner!!!! Hate Groups. That’s code for libtard ‘It’s free speech to tell the troops they are dying or wounded for oil but if you say something I don’t agree with it’s hate speech’. Or if I had bashed Christians and anybody protested they would have said ‘free speech’ but noooo tell the ‘peaceful tolerant moooslems’ to go piss up a rope and yahoo (sucks) will nuke ya.

Oh by the way ‘Eva’ I hope ya will enjoy wearing a berka….

Slick Willie...

After Bill Clinton Dies he goes directly to Hell. Upon arriving he is met by Satan, who informs him that Hell is currently full but since he REALLY deserves to be there, they will make special arrangements by letting someone else leave to make room for Bill. And, as a special favor, he will be given a choice of people to replace. Satan then leads Bill to a room with three doors.

The first door opens. Behind the door is Al Gore. He’s being worked over with a blowtorch. Upon seeing Al in this predicament, Clinton cringes and says, 'That looks painful. I don’t think this is for me'.

The second door opens. Behind door #2 is Nancy Pelosi. Her skin is being stripped off with a pair of pliers. Grimacing at the bloody scene, Clinton again says, 'I don’t think this is for me'.

The third door opens and behind it is Ted Kennedy. He is naked and bound hand and foot. Kneeling before him is Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. 'I can handle that!' Clinton proclaims enthusiastically.

'Very well', says Satan. 'Monica, you’ve been pardoned - you may go now'.

Religion of Peace (my ass)

CHAPEL HILL, N.C. -- Authorities say 23-year-old Mohammed Reza Taheri-azar, who drove a silver Jeep Grand Cherokee into The Pit at the UNC-Chapel Hill campus around noon Friday, may have acted to avenge American treatment of Muslims.

The FBI joined the case because Taheri-azar, a native of Iran, "allegedly made statements that he acted to avenge the American treatment of Muslims. The ongoing investigation will work to confirm this," said Special Agent Richard Kolko, an FBI spokesman in Washington.

Yep a Religion of Peace.....

Story Here

Found Here.
Not work safe if ya work with libtards...

Swabbies...

An enterprising, but bashful sailor finds himself on shore leave in Korea for his first time. While the rest of the guys are out having a jolly good time in the red light district of Pusan, [Texas Street] our hero just can't get up the nerve to ask the local girls how much it costs for a good time [Not me]. He sits at his table for a moment watching the girls, and devises a get laid plan.
One of the local girls approaches him and asks, "Wat is you name?"
He replies, "Rick Venus"
She says, "Lick Penus?"
He says, "Sure how much?"

Oh did I mention I've been to Pusan a couple of times while I was in the US Navy...
The Korean People were always very nice and helpful. At least the ones that remember the Korean War. We stopped at a lot of places while I was in the USN but Thailand was my favorite.
That would be a long post.

Oh Those WMD's....

Ya won't see this on the Lame Stream Media and it will make all the anti-war libtards stick their fingers in their ears and go LALALALALALALLA

Yes, the linchpin of opposition to the Iraq War — never really strong to begin with — has taken some real hits in recent weeks. And "Bush lied" — the anti-war mantra about the president, Saddam Hussein and weapons of mass destruction — looks the most battered.

Inconveniently for critics of the war, Saddam made tapes in his version of the Oval Office. These tapes landed in the hands of American intelligence and were recently aired publicly.

Oh wait it gets better....

Nobody disputes the tapes' authenticity. On them, Saddam talks openly of programs involving biological, chemical and, yes, nuclear weapons.

War foes have long asserted that Saddam halted his WMD programs in the wake of his defeat in the first Gulf War in 1991. Saddam's abandonment of WMD programs was confirmed by subsequent U.N. inspections.

Again, not true. In a tape dating to April 1995, Saddam and several aides discuss the fact that U.N. inspectors had found traces of Iraq's biological weapons program. On the tape, Hussein Kamel, Saddam's son-in-law, is heard gloating about fooling the inspectors.

Full Story Here

Found Here Not Work Safe.

How to bathe a cat

Please forward to cat lovers everywhere who, like myself, are very concerned about their hygiene.

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape).

CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any purchase they can find.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "powerwash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,

The DOG

Question?

We all know that PETA likes to protest against people wearing leather.
Why have we not seen any protests at Sturgis?

Shes Generous

All of the evidence is not in, but it appears that Secretary of State Rice may have slept with Senator Ted Kennedy.

I will send details when they become available. All I have now is this photograph.

Things that make you think a little:

There were 39 combat related killings in Iraq in January.
In the fair city of Detroit there were 35 murders in the month of January. That's just one American city, about as deadly as the entire war-torn country of Iraq.

When some claim that President Bush shouldn't have started this war, state the following:

a. FDR led us into World War II.

b. Germany never attacked us; Japan did.
From 1941-1945, 450,000 lives were lost ... an average of 112,500 per year.

c. Truman finished that war and started one in Korea.
North Korea never attacked us..
From 1950-1953, 55,000 lives were lost ... an average of 18,334 per year.

d John F. Kennedy started the Vietnam conflict in 1962.
Vietnam never attacked us.

e. Johnson turned Vietnam into a quagmire.
From 1965-1975, 58,000 lives were lost .. an average of 5,800 per year.

f. Clinton went to war in Bosnia without UN or French consent.
Bosnia never attacked us.
He was offered Osama bin Laden's head on a platter three times by Sudan and did nothing. Osama has attacked us on multiple occasions.

g. In the years since terrorists attacked us , President Bush has liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled al-Qaida, put nuclear inspectors in Libya without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist who slaughtered 300,000 of his own people.

The Democrats are complaining about how long the war is taking.
But
It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno to take the Branch Davidian compound.
That was a 51-day operation..

We've been looking for evidence for chemical weapons in Iraq for less time than it took Hillary Clinton to find the Rose Law Firm billing records.

It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard than it took Ted Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sank at Chappaquiddick.

It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida!!!!

Our Commander-In-Chief is doing a GREAT JOB!
The Military morale is high!

The biased media hopes we are too ignorant to realize the facts.


If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.

WINTER CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS

Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor -
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

There is?

Lost Loves

I saw this story in the Odd News section and it struck a cord with me. Something simular is going on in my life right now, just hope I don't screw things up.
This line is so true, for me anyway.

Couple Reunite After More Than 60 Years
"You don't know how our lives might have turned out if we'd gotten married in 1941," Mason said. "But now, she has a wonderful family and so do I."

In those days I was not ready for a relationship. That's still a debatable question. Although I've been through a divorce and some bad relationships I still believe that "It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all".

Full Story Here.

So Far....

So far I think I'm going to like it here. As long as I don't piss off to many liberals or mooslems. It's better than yahoo (sucks) blogs cause they let ya 'tweek under the hood' with code. I like that. Although it looks like html has changed a bit over the last few years I should be able to figure it out. The jave script could be a different story. Oh well something new to learn.

Awsome Rack Day

This will be a semi-regular post here. I hope it will keep the 'peaceful and tolarant mooslems' away. I know that if I posted pics of stump broke camels they would flock here. So stay away or I will tell Allah that you are looking at pics of nekkid ladies.

Hay

For those of you first stopping by and say 'There ain't nothin here' Hey I just moved in. After I irked the PC folks at yahoo (sucks) blogs due to my posts about 'peaceful and tolerent mooslems'. The people at yahoo (sucks) , decided not only to delete my blog but my email and home page. Can't wait untill I can afford to buy space so that sh*t can't happen again. Look's like I'll have to post less of my opinion and more of news stories about the Religion of Peace (my ass) Along with all the other stuff I post.
So stand by for funny pics, jokes, boobies and news.

Well first post here. Will do more after I get things set up.